I don't mind being alone but I don't want to be lonely.
I've been sleeping alone for the most part for the better part of 9 months now. I'm used to it but I'm not comfortable. Why? Because I don't want to sleep alone. Does that mean that I can't sleep alone or I am unhappy sleeping alone. Absolutely not. It's just that is not the goal.
I want to wake up next to someone.
I know what the process is. My marriage failed and that is a fact. Putting pressure on myself to find someone to be with is a HUGE mistake. This is also a fact.
None of this takes away from what the end goal is. I want to go to bed next so someone and wake up next tto that someone.
It's a fine line we walk as single people. Sure we want someone but do we need someone? Sure we need someone but do we want someone?
The waters are muddy and the road is a broken one. Each day though brings meaning and each experience brings a new level of understanding.
I am ready now. I am ready to share my life with someone.
But I do not have to.